1. Hitting the snooze button
Bed is your happy place. If there’s anything better than snuggling up in your blankets and shutting out the rest of the world, you haven’t heard about it.
But you have places to be. At this point, you should be grown-up enough to realize that those 9 extra minutes of sleep (that then turn into 18, and then 27) aren’t worth that groggy, shitty feeling when you finally roll out of bed with no time to spare before you rush out the door.
2. Using your phone while driving
You take your eyes off the road for a second to read a text, but it’s okay because you won’t respond until you get to a red light.
Except you didn’t quite finish typing when the light turned green, and now you’re trying to keep up with the flow of traffic, stay in your lane, not get caught by the cops, and text your BFF about something pointless. Luckily, you didn’t cause an accident… today.
3. Eating fast food for lunch
It’s so bad for you, but it’s so cheap and easy. You know you should probably start making a small, healthy lunch for yourself, but those french fries are delicious. You’ll just have to make sure that you hit the gym extra hard tonight.
But then again, it was one cheeseburger. Nobody gets fat from one cheeseburger, right?
4. Not going to the gym
Thinking about it doesn’t count. Making a workout plan while you sit at home watching Netflix doesn’t count. Buying new yoga pants absolutely doesn’t count.
You have to actually get up, go to the gym, and get on the treadmill. Which you totally didn’t.
5. Ignoring a call from your mother
Granted, she probably didn’t want anything important. But she’s your mother. It won’t kill you to pick up the phone- and if those accusational follow-up texts are any indication, it just might kill her if you don’t.
6. Forgetting to check your mailbox
Not your email account. Your actual, physical mailbox. You know, the one where you get things like bills, and notices from the government, and bank statements? All your important, life-altering adult documents and responsibilities show up in that little box.
But it’s just soooooo out of the way, so you keep putting it off until you miss a deadline for something that you really couldn’t afford to blow off.
7. Stalking your ex on social media
Have some self-control. Yeah, if he really didn’t want you to know what he’s up to, he could set his profile to private. Or you could stop torturing yourself by meticulously analyzing every status update to see if it could possibly be a cryptic reference to how much he misses you. And you could definitely stop visiting the profiles of every unknown female he interacts with to see if she’s hotter than you are.
*Previously published by Thought Catalog at www.thoughtcatalog.com.